Guide on How to Fail at Online Dating 52

Chapter 52

Seeing his silence, Xiang Huaizhi thought he might have misunderstood.

“It’s not that I don’t want you to like someone else.”

Jing Huan cursed Xiangwang Zhizhi a thousand times in his heart, then typed.

[Team] SweetScenery: How could I possibly like anyone else besides you, big bro T.T

He couldn’t turn on his mic—he was afraid he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from cursing.

Xiang Huaizhi thought he had made himself perfectly clear.

He nodded: “During this period when I’m not around, try not to leave the safe zone.”

With that MaiMai’s temperament, you can tell at a glance she’s not the type to swallow her pride after being killed—she’s bound to stir up trouble.

[Team]SweetJing: It’s fine, I’m not scared of her at all >.<

Jing Huan genuinely wasn’t worried. MaiMai’s equipment was top-notch, but her skills were terrible—the epitome of a pay-to-win player.

He believed this was precisely why Nine Heroes had endured—even low-spending players could stand against pay-to-win opponents if their skills were good enough.

Of course, not spending a single cent won’t work either.

“You’re not afraid,” Xiang Huaizhi glanced at the Little Fox Immortal beside him, “When did you buy the equipment on you?”

The Little Fox Immortal no longer had just a glowing ring on her.

She held a purple whip in her hand, the gourd at her waist emitted a white light, and even her belt had the design of a purple-tier item.

Jing Huan froze for a moment before remembering that in a fit of anger earlier, he had bought a full set of equipment.

[Team]SweetJing: I…

[Team]SweetJing: I was so mad at the time! QAQ

“Where did the money come from?”

[Team]SweetScene: Living expenses…

“Living expenses are enough to buy these?”

No?

What kind of strange conversation is this?

Jing Huan felt like he was being audited by his wife.

[Team]SweetJing: Well, I’m overdrawn! This month I’ll have to survive on steamed buns!

“…” Xiang Huaizhi choked.

He never expected there’d actually be someone who’d skip meals just for the sake of gaming.

“Why only type and not talk?” Xiang Huaizhi picked up his phone, “I can lend you some. How much do you need?”

Jing Huan was taken aback: “Huh? No, no need! I still have money on my meal card, and I’m actually trying to lose weight right now…”

“You’re not fat, no need to diet.”

There was a brief silence in the voice chat.

Jing Huan asked, “How do you know I’m not fat?”

Xiang Huaizi paused for two seconds before answering casually, “Just a guess.”

Smooth talker!

“Really, there’s no need, big brother! The meat buns at our school are actually quite delicious—thin skin, thick filling, and only one yuan fifty each!” Jing Huan paused before adding, “Besides, we’re not in that kind of relationship. How could I spend your money? If you really feel bad for me, why not fulfill another dream of mine? Let’s go to the Matchmaker’s Temple…”

“I got it.” Xiang Huaizhi put down his phone. “Then you’ll just have to eat at the cafeteria.”

“……”

Jing Huan was just about to whimper when a friend’s message suddenly popped up.

[Exotic Merchant: Congratulations, young hero! Autumn Maple has gifted you a set of “Lantern Spirits.” Please proceed to the Unknown Exotic Lands (118, 29) to claim your new outfit!]

Jing Huan froze for a moment and instinctively sent a “?” to Autumn Maple.

[Friend] Qiufeng: Comfort gift [head pat]

Jing Huan didn’t reply. Instead, he turned on his mic and asked, “Brother, can you go to the Unknown Frontier?”

“Why?”

“Qiufeng sent me a new outfit set, and I want to return it.”

The Nine Heroes gifting system has a ridiculous rule – if a gift is stored with the exotic merchant for over half an hour, a handling fee called “storage charge” will be incurred.

Although the amount is small, Jing Huan refuses to waste money on it.

Heart Towards Silence didn’t say anything more and led him away from Fallen Blossom Valley.

When they reached the exotic merchant, Jing Huan left the party and quickly returned the costume.

[Friend] Autumn Maple: It’s just an outfit, can’t you accept it?

[Friend] Sweet Scenery: I appreciate the thought, no need to spend money 0.0

Just seconds after sending the message, the friend icon lit up again. Jing Huan initially thought it was Autumn Maple replying, but upon opening it, saw the system’s distinctive pink message box instead.

[Wandering Merchant: Congratulations, young hero! Heart’s Yearning has gifted you a “Lantern Sprite” outfit set. Please proceed to Unknown Frontier (118, 29) to claim your new attire!] ???

Are these two addicted to gifting?

[Friend] Heart’s Desire: Keep it.

[Friend] Sweet Little Scene: I can’t keep accepting such expensive things from you…

[Friend] Heart’sDesire: ?

[Friend] Heart’s Desire: If you return it to me, I’ll give it to Faraway Journey.

[Friend] Little Sweet Scene: Thank you, big brother. Do you think it looks good on me?

Jing Huan changed into the clothes.

He originally didn’t want to scam Heart’s Yearning for that 1,200 bucks, but since the scumbag insisted on handing it over willingly, then he couldn’t be blamed for having no conscience.

[Friend] Heart’s Desire: Yeah. Have you done today’s daily quests?

[Friend] SweetJing: “…I would’ve forgotten if you didn’t remind me QAQ”

[Friend] HeartWanter: Join party, I’ll take you through it.

Jing happily took the free ride and quickly joined his party.

After half an hour of grinding, Jing opened his food delivery app pondering what to order when his girl friend came knocking.

[Friend] Love is Sharing with You: Damn Jingjing [angry]! What’s going on?! Why did you even quit the guild? And you’re not replying to my WeChat messages!

Jing Huan froze for a moment, opened WeChat to check, and indeed found many unread messages.

[Friend] Sweet Little Jing: My WeChat was acting up, no notifications QAQ! I had a conflict with Beloved MaiMai and was afraid of dragging the guild into it, so I left.

[Friend] Love is Sharing with You: No way, Beloved MaiMai already had some issues with our guild anyway.

[Friend] Sweet Jing: 0.0 What kind of conflict was it?

[Friend] Love is Sharing with You: Can we switch to voice chat? I’m eating and typing is inconvenient.

[Friend] SweetJing: Got it.

Jing Huan turned off the game microphone and connected with Love is Sharing with You via WeChat voice call.

“He once killed a junior from the Idle Pavilion so badly they quit the game, and he also had a fight with Chun Xiao. It was pretty unpleasant overall. But this happened before you started playing, so it’s normal you wouldn’t know, and many in the guild don’t like him either,” Love is Sharing with You said. “This afternoon, everyone was discussing how to help you vent your anger.”

Jing Huan was taken aback: “Standing up for me?”

Love is Sharing with You: “Yeah, the leader of Autumn Maple Hall even privately contacted Mai Mai’s Biggest Fan, and even Xiang Shen popped up.”

Jing Huan regretted leaving the group so quickly: “Ah… what did my brother say?”

“I’ll send you the screenshot on WeChat.”

Jing Huan quickly picked up his phone to look at the picture.

[Mo Wen Gui Qi: No way, did they really quit? There’s no need for that…

Chasing Wind Youth: Seriously unnecessary, we’re not afraid of trouble.

Favorite Peach Tea: Will that Sweet Little Jing return to the guild?

Chun Xiao: Si Xiang and I are on vacation. We’ll handle it when we return tomorrow.

Qiu Feng: This guy “Favorite Mai Mai” – we let him off last time, and now he’s messing with our guild members again. Don’t worry, I’ll definitely get justice for Xiao Jing.

Mo Wen Gui Qi: Alright! The Hall Master is mighty!

Xin Xiang Wang Zhi: @Qiu Feng She’s part of my team. I’ll deal with this myself—no need for you to intervene.】

Jing Huan read the words from Heart’s Desire several times over before finally asking, “What else did brother say?”

“Nothing, just that one line,” Love is Sharing with You said with a click of her tongue. “God Xiang is really cool when he talks now, totally different from before.”

“Before?”

“Yeah, when Xian Xian was still with him…” Love is Sharing with You abruptly stopped mid-sentence.

Jing Huan then remembered that Love to Share Once was actually friends with Fairy Mengmeng.

He unconsciously straightened his back and asked curiously, “What was it like when you were with Fairy Mengmeng?”

Love to Share Once hemmed and hawed, “…It was just okay.”

“Come on, tell me,” Jing Huan said. “I promise I won’t spread it around!”

“Just like any ordinary couple, nothing too special.” Love Is Sharing Food With You thought for a moment. “Well, just spending about ten hours a day on voice chat with each other.”

Is there that much to talk about?

Jing Huan let out a couple of emotionless laughs. “How do you even know about this?”

“Xianxian often flaunts their relationship, so quite a few people know,” Love Is Sharing Food With You said. “They have matching couple profile pictures on WeChat, and Xiangwangzhi seems to post her photos frequently on his Moments. She even sent me screenshots of his posts before… Though I think Xiangshen changed his WeChat profile picture recently?”

Jing Huan recalled his rejected friend request, his smile growing even stiffer.

Xin Xiangwangzhi’s Moments were also completely clean, clearly wiped clean after the breakup.

“Matching couple avatars…” he murmured.

Remembering all the dog food he’d eaten before, unable to stop himself from sharing: “Yeah, God Xiang even used to call her ‘Xianxian baby,’ ‘wifey’… who would’ve guessed, right?”

Jing Huan: “…”

What did Heart’s Desire call himself again?

Other than “Sweet Little Jing,” he couldn’t think of anything else.

Wait… Heart’s Desire would actually voice chat with someone for ten hours straight, use matching couple avatars, and even call them “baby”?

Jing Huan simply couldn’t connect these behaviors with the person now holding his hand as they walked.

And why?

Why is it that for others, you change your profile picture and post on social media, but when it comes to me, you can’t even say a single kind word?!

Jing Huan suddenly felt upset.

Extremely upset.

So upset that I don’t even feel like eating dinner.

LoveIsSharingFood realized she had spoken out of turn after saying: “But… XiangShen treats you well too. Look, he even helps you kill people.”

“Did he ever help XianMengMeng kill anyone?”

Hearing the other person’s dejected tone, LoveIsSharingFood quickly replied: “No! During the time they were together, they didn’t even play the arena often.”

“Not playing in the arena?” Jing Huan asked, puzzled. “Then what do they usually do?”

“Well, running dungeons, enjoying the scenery, taking photos…” Love is Sharing with You coughed lightly, “things like that.”

“……”

Damn it! This guy obviously knows everything! Why does he act all cold and aloof in front of me every day?!

After hanging up the voice call, Jing Huan sat in his chair, not even wanting to order takeout anymore.

Jing Huan grew angrier the more he thought about it!

How could Heart’s Desire be so blatantly biased in his treatment!

[Team] Heart’s Desire: Where’d you go.

[Team] Sweet Little Jing: …I’m here.

[Team]Heart’s Desire: Why did you turn off the mic?

Because Dad doesn’t want to talk to you, you hypocritical dog.

[Team]Sweet Scenery: No, I was just on voice chat with Chi Chi.

Xiang Huaizhi paused mid-sip of water.

[Team] Heartyearns: Are you two close?

[Team] Little Sweetscenery: Of course, we’re teammates after all.

[Team] Heartyearns: .

Unlike Qiufeng, LoveIsSharing is a girl. If Jinghuan’s crush were her instead… that might not be bad either.

Xiang Huaizhi thought expressionlessly.

After completing their daily tasks, the two stood next to the main city NPC, neither speaking.

After a long while, Xiang Huaizhi finally snapped out of his thoughts and was about to type.

“Brother,” the person in the team called out to him pitifully.

“Hmm?”

“You promised me that I could come to you for anything in the game,” Jing Huan said, “right?”

“Mm.”

“Then can you come with me to take some photos?”

Xiang Huaizhi was slightly taken aback: “Photo?”

“Yeah,” Jing Huan said without a hint of shame, “I want a photo of us in a kissing pose!”

Xiang Huaizhi: “…”

Xiang Huaizhi: “Why would you film that?”

Jing Huan didn’t know why he wanted to take photos either.

But he just felt like taking them.

“I just want to take pictures,” Jing Huan said. “Is that okay, gege?”

Ten minutes later, the two arrived before the full moon at the Moon Palace.

【Little Sweet Scenery wants to kiss you. Agree, refuse.】

Xiang Huaizhi’s cursor hovered back and forth between the two words, hesitant and uncertain.

In the end, he pressed his fingers to his forehead and clicked “Agree.”

The little fox fairy tilted its head, its bushy tail swaying gently, before lightly planting a kiss at the corner of his lips.

Under the flowers and the moon, in such a beautiful moment with such a lovely scene, there were even a few jade rabbits hopping around his feet.

He stared at this scene for a few seconds, his finger unconsciously pressing the screenshot button.

“Big brother,” the female voice in the headset called to him, still unsatisfied. “Can you call me… you know… baby?”

As he spoke, his voice grew softer and softer.

“……”

Xiang Huaizhi choked up, his throat as if blocked by something, only managing to squeeze out after a long pause: “What?”

“Just call me that in the game!” Jing Huan forced himself to appear righteous and confident, “This—this counts as part of the game too, right…”

Xiang Huaizhi: “No.”

“Why not…” Jing Huan protested indignantly, “Brother isn’t keeping his word!”

Xiang Huai chuckled: “Who would ever make such a request?”

“I would!” Jing Huan said. “Come on, call me ‘brother’—it won’t cost you a piece of flesh.”

“No.”

“Just once! Only once!” Jing Huan insisted. “Just once is enough!”

“……”

Jing Huan turned on the recording device, thinking about how to persuade Xiangwang Zhi to agree.

He planned to record that “baby” and send it to Xiangwang Zhi’s email every day after revealing the truth!

Seeing Xiangwang Zhi’s silence, Jing Huan whispered coquettishly, “Brother, I…”

“…Baby.”

The sudden sound fell upon his ears, and Jing Huan froze for a moment.

The boy spoke quickly, yet every word was crystal clear. His voice was low and slightly hoarse, already pleasant to the ear, but coupled with the helplessness and indulgence in his tone… no one could listen without feeling their heart flutter.

For a few fleeting seconds, Jing Huan even had the illusion—as if they were truly in an online romance, as if he genuinely adored Heart’s Yearning and was earnestly pursuing him.

It took Jing Huan a long while to snap out of the daze brought on by that single “darling.”

His cheeks felt slightly warm, his throat dry, so he grabbed a water glass and took a big gulp.

Gotta admit, this scumbag… really has some skills.

After processing it for a while, Jing Huan suddenly snapped back to reality—he hadn’t turned on the recording!!

“Brother, I… I didn’t hear it just now,” Jing Huan hurriedly said. “Say it again.”

Xiang Huaizhi: “If you didn’t hear it, how do you know I called?”

…Now you’re suddenly being quite clever.

Jing Huan: “Wuwu, one more time, just one last time!”

“No.” The voice on the other end refused.

“Brother…”

“Don’t act cute… it won’t work.” Xiang Huaizhi said hoarsely, “I’m going AFK for a while, message me on WeChat if you need anything.”

After sending this message, Xiang Huaizhi stood up with his cup in hand to pour some water.

Just as he finished filling his cup, the dorm room door suddenly opened.

“I’m exhausted. I shouldn’t have signed up for that class with you—every Friday leaves me dead on my feet,” Lu Hang complained as he walked in, looking utterly drained. “And you left early today! Do you know how bored I was sitting there alone? You left like a gust of wind—I thought your account got hacked again…”

Lu Hang had been ready to vent, but the words died in his throat the moment he got a clear look at his roommate’s face.

“You…” Lu Hang frowned, leaning in closer. “Why is your face red?”

Xiang Huaizi pushed his face away and said expressionlessly, “It’s hot.”


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